Americanised Ramayan

Here's something sooo cooool.Check it out.

Americanised Ramayana



How does a ABCD(American Born Confused Desi) explain
to his younger brother the topic - How did Diwali
begin?

This is how he goes about it............(read it
with an American accent)

So, like this dude had, like, a big cool kingdom and
people liked  him.
But, like, his step mom, or somethin', was kind of a
bitch, and  she forced her husband to, like, you
know, send this cool dude, he  was Ram, to some
national forest or reserve or  somethin'.
Since he was going, for like,somethin' like more
than 10 years or  so, he decided to take his wife and
his bro along.
You know...so  that they could all chill out
together.
But dude, the forest was reeeeeeal scary shit,
really man, they  had monkeys and devils and shit
like that. But this  dude, Ram,  kicked the ass with
darts, bows and arrows, so it  was fine.

But then some bad gansta' boys, some jerk called
Ravan, picks up  his babe (Sita) and lures her away
to his hood. And  boy, were our  man, and his bro
Lakshman, pissed! And you don't  piss this
son-of-a-gunz 'coz, he just kicks ass and like, all
the gods were  with him.
So anyways, you don't mess with gods. So, Ram and
his bro get an  army of monkeys. Dude, don't ask me
how they trained  the damn  monkeys, just go along
with me, OK.  So, Ram, Lakhs, and their monkeys whip
this gansta's  ass in his  own hood.

Anyways, by now, their time's up in the forest and
anyways, it  gets kinda boring.
You know no TVs or malls or shit like that. So, they
decided to  hitch back home.
His bro and the wife are back home. People
thought,well, you know,  at least they deserve
somethin' nice and they didn't  have any bars
and clubs in those days. So they couldn't take them
out for a  drink, so the people decided to smoke
shit. And they  also had some lamps, they  lit the
lamps too.

So it was pretty cooool..you know with all those
fireworks really,  they had some local band play
along with the  fireworks and you  know what, dude,
that was the very first, no   kidding, that was the
very first musical-synchronized fireworks. You know,
like the 4th of the July  stuff, but just more cooler
and stuff, you know.  And, so dude,  that was how,
like, this festival started.
Cool!! Diwali Rocks Maaaannnnnn!!!!!!!!

Life is so full of opportunities - gud one

A young man wished to marry the farmer’s beautiful daughter. He went to the farmer to ask his permission.

 The farmer looked him over and said,

 “Son, go stand out in that field. I’m going to release three bulls, one at a time. If you can catch the tail of any one of the three bulls, you can marry my daughter.”

The young man stood in the pasture awaiting the first bull.

The barn door opened and out ran the biggest, meanest-looking bull he had ever seen. He decided that one of the next bulls had to be a better choice than this one, so he ran over to the side and let the bull pass through the pasture out the back gate.

The barn door opened again. Unbelievable. He had never seen anything so big and fierce in his life. It stood pawing the ground, grunting, slinging slobber as it eyed him. Whatever the next bull was like, it had to be a better choice than this one. He ran to the fence and let the bull pass through the pasture, out the back gate.

The door opened a third time. A smile came across his face. This was the weakest, scrawniest little bull he had ever seen. This one was his bull. As the bull came running by, he positioned himself just right and jumped at just the exact moment.

He grabbed… but the bull had no tail!

Moral

Life is full of opportunities.  Some will be easy to take advantage of, some will be difficult.  But once we let them pass (often in hopes of something better), those opportunities may never again be available. So always grab the first opportunity.

navratri poojas starting from 02nd oct at MARUTI GARDENS, LAKDI-KA-POOL, HYDERABAD

This year Navaratri Poojas will follow 3 days format. (Oct 02 – Oct 04 2011)

Jai gurudev NAVARATRI CELEBRATION -2011 With the Divine Blessing Poojya Sri Sri Ravi Shankar Guruji (Founder – The Art of Living International Centre) Khara Samvatsara Sharada Navaratri – Nava Chandi Homam The art of Living Centre - Hyderabad
SCHEDULE OF THE VEDIC -- PROGRAM
2011.October 02 Shashti – Sunday Anuradha Nakshatra	08:30 AM 09:00 AM 12:30 PM	Sri Maha Ganesha Pooja, SRI MAHA GANPATHI HOMAM SRI NAVAGRAHA HOMAM Poornahuthi, Mangalarthi
	05:00 PM 05.30 PM 08:20 PM 08:30 PM	LALITHA SAHASRAM VASHTHUSHANTHI HOMAM Poornahuthi, Mangalarthi SATSANG
2011.October 03 Sapthami – Monday Jyestha Nakshatra	07:00 AM 12:30 PM	SHRI MAHA RUDRA HOMAM Poornahuthi, Mangalarthi
	05:00 PM 05.30 PM 08:20 PM	Sri Vishnu Sahasranama Parayanam SRI MAHA SUDARSHANAHOMAM Poornahuthi, Mangalarthi
2001. October 04 Ashtami – Tuesday Moola Nakshatra	07:00 AM 12:30 PM	SRI NAVA CHANDI HOMAM MAHA POORNAHUTHI, Mangalarthi
	6.30 PM	SATSANG

does GOD exist

This is one of the best explanations of why God allows pain and suffering that I have seen...

 

A man went to a barbershop to have his hair cut and his beard trimmed.
As the barber began to work, they began to have a good conversation.
They talked about so many things and various subjects.
When they eventually touched on the subject of God, the barber said:
"I don't believe that God exists."

 

"Why do you say that?" asked the customer. "Well, you just have to go out in the street to realize that God doesn't exist.
Tell me, if God exists, would there be so many sick people?
Would there be abandoned children?

 

If God existed, there would be neither suffering nor pain.
I can't imagine a loving God who would allow all of these things."
The customer thought for a moment, but didn't respond because he didn't want to start an argument.
The barber finished his job and the customer left the shop.

 

Just after he left the barbershop, he saw a man in the street with long, stringy, dirty hair and an untrimmed beard.
He looked dirty and unkempt. The customer turned back and entered the barber shop again and he said to the barber:
"You know what? Barbers do not exist."
"How can you say that?" asked the surprised barber.
"I am here, and I am a barber. And I just worked on you!"
"No!" the customer exclaimed. "Barbers don't exist because
if they did, there would be no people with dirty long hair and untrimmed beards, like that man outside."

 

"Ah, but barbers DO exist! That's what happens when people do not come to me."
"Exactly!" affirmed the customer. "That's the point! God, too, DOES exist!
That's what happens when people do not go to Him and don't look to Him for help.
That's why there's so much pain and suffering in the world."

The Hindu Rate Of Wrath

The Hindu Rate Of Wrath By Francois Gautierr Is there such a thing as 'Hindu terrorism', as the arrest of Sadhvi Pragya Singh Thakur for the Malegaon blasts may tend to prove? Well, I guess I was asked to write this column because I am one of that rare breed of foreign correspondents—a lover of Hindus! A born Frenchman, Catholic-educated and non-Hindu, I do hope I'll be given some credit for my opinions, which are not the product of my parents' ideas, my education or my atavism, but garnered from 25 years of reporting in South Asia (for Le Journal de Geneve and Le Figaro).  In the early 1980s, when I started freelancing in south India, doing photo features on Kalaripayattu, the Ayyappa festival, or the Ayyanars, I slowly realised that the genius of this country lies in its Hindu ethos, in the true spirituality behind Hinduism. The average Hindu you meet in a million villages possesses this simple, innate spirituality and accepts your diversity, whether you are Christian or Muslim, Jain or Arab, French or Chinese. It is this Hinduness that makes the Indian Christian different from, say, a French Christian, or the Indian Muslim unlike a Saudi Muslim. I also learnt that Hindus not only believed that the divine could manifest itself at different times, under different names, using different scriptures (not to mention the wonderful avatar concept, the perfect answer to 21st century religious strife) but that they had also given refuge to persecuted minorities from across the world—Syrian Christians, Parsis, Jews, Armenians, and today, Tibetans.  In 3,500 years of existence, Hindus have never militarily invaded another country, never tried to impose their religion on others by force or induced conversions. You cannot find anybody less fundamentalist than a Hindu in the world and it saddens me when I see the Indian and western press equating terrorist groups like SIMI, which blow up innocent civilians, with ordinary, angry Hindus who burn churches without killing anybody. We know also that most of these communal incidents often involve persons from the same groups—often Dalits and tribals—some of who have converted to Christianity and others not.  However reprehensible the destruction of Babri Masjid, no Muslim was killed in the process; compare this to the 'vengeance' bombings of 1993 in Bombay, which wiped out hundreds of innocents, mostly Hindus.  Yet the Babri Masjid destruction is often described by journalists as the more horrible act of the two. We also remember how Sharad Pawar, when he wasChief minister of Maharashtra in 1993, lied about a bomb that was supposed to have gone off in a Muslim locality of Bombay. I have never been politically correct, but have always written what I have discovered while reporting. Let me then be straightforward about this so-called Hindu terror. Hindus, since the first Arab invasions, have been at the receiving end of terrorism, whether it was by Timur, who killed 1,00,000 Hindus in a single day in 1399, or by the Portuguese Inquisition which crucified Brahmins in Goa. Today, Hindus are still being targeted: there were one million Hindus in the Kashmir valley in 1900; only a few hundred remain, the rest having fled in terror. Blasts after blasts have killed hundreds of innocent Hindus all over India in the last four years.  Hindus, the overwhelming majority community of this country, are being made fun of, are despised, are deprived of the most basic facilities for one of their most sacred pilgrimages in Amarnath while their government heavily sponsors the Haj. They see their brothers and sisters converted to Christianity through inducements and financial traps, see a harmless 84-year-old swami and a sadhvi brutally murdered. Their gods are blasphemed. So sometimes, enough is enough. At some point, after years or even centuries of submitting like sheep to slaughter, Hindus—whom the Mahatma once gently called cowards—erupt in uncontrolled fury. And it hurts badly. It happened in Gujarat. It happened in Jammu, then in Kandhamal, Mangalore, and Malegaon. It may happen again elsewhere. What should be understood is that this is a spontaneous revolution on the ground, by ordinary Hindus, without any planning from the political leadership.  Therefore, the BJP, instead of acting embarrassed, should not disown those who choose other means to let their anguished voices be heard. There are about a billion Hindus, one in every six persons on this planet. They form one of the most successful, law-abiding and integrated communities in the world today. Can you call them terrorists? (The writer is editor-in-chief of the Paris-based La Revue de l'Inde)

FAITH & PATIENCE - A nice story i came across ;-)

FAITH & PATIENCE     

                                        

once there was a sweeper in a well known temple and he was very sincere and devoted .Every time he saw thousands of devotees coming to take darshan of the Lord, he thought that the Lord is standing all the time and giving darshan and He must be feeling very tired.

so one day very innocently he asked the Lord whether he can take the place of the Lord for a day so that the Lord can have some relief and rest.the Deity of the Temple replied," I do not mind taking a break. I will transform you like Myself . but you must do one thing. You must just stand here like Me, smile at everyone and just give benedictions.Donot interfere with anything and don’t say anything. Remember you are the deity and you just have faith that I have a master plan for everything. " the sweeper agreed to this.

the next day the sweeper took the position of the Deity and a rich man came and prayed to the Lord. He offered a nice donation and prayed that his business should be prosperous. while going, the rich man inadvertently left his wallet full of money right here. Now the sweeper in the form of deity could not call him and so he decided to control himself and keep quiet.
just then a poor man came and he put one coin in the Hundi and said that it was all he could afford and he prayed to the Lord that he should continue to be engaged in the Lord's service. he also said that his family was in dire need of some basic needs but he left it to the good hands of the Lord to give some solution. When he opened his eyes , he saw the wallet left by the rich man. the poor man thanked the Lord for His kindness and took the wallet very innocently. the sweeper in the form of the deity could not say anything and he had to just keep smiling.

at that point a sailor walked in .he prayed for his safe journey as he was going on a long trip. just then the rich man came with the police and said that somebody has stolen his wallet and seeing the sailor there, he asked the police to arrest him thinking that he might have taken it. Now the sweeper in the form of Deity wanted to say that the sailor is not the thief but he could not say so and he became greatly frustrated. the sailor looked at the Lord and asked why he, an innocent person, is being punished . the rich man looked at the Lord and thanked Him for finding the thief. The sweeper in the Deity form could no more tolerate and he thought that even if the real Lord had been here, he would have definitely interfered and hence he started speaking and said that the sailor is not the thief but it was the poor man who took away the wallet. the rich man was very thankful as also the sailor.

in the night, the real Lord came and He asked the sweeper how the day was. the sweeper said, I thought it would be easy ,but how i know that Your days are not easy, but I did one good thing". Then he explained the whole episode to the Lord. the Lord became very upset on hearing this whereas the sweeper thought the Lord would appreciate him for the good deed done.

The Lord asked, "why did you not just stick to the plan? You had no faith in ME.Do you think that I do not understand the hearts of all those who come here?All the donation which the rich man gave was all stolen money and it is only a fraction of what he really has and he wants Me to reciprocate unlimited. The single coin offered by the poor man was the last coin he was having and he gave it to Me out of faith. The sailor might not have done anything, but if the sailor were go in the ship that night he was about to die because of bad weather and instead if he is arrested he would be in the jail and he would have been save from a grater calamity. The wallet should go to the poor man because he will use it in My service. I was going to reduce the rich man's karma also by doing this and save the sailor also. But you cancelled everything because you thought you know My plan and you made you own plans."

God has plans and justice for everyone....all that is .. we just need to have patience and faith in Him.

navratri pamphlet page2

navratri pamphlet page1

Friend, father & philosopher of black money is Chidambaram : Ram Jethmalani

The article posted on http://www.sunday-guardian.com/ is not opening so we have decided to post it on blog. We feel that people must read this article, in case publishers of Sunday Guradian feel this is a copyright violation, please drop in a line at kumarjgd@gmail.com we will be happy to remove the story.

Friend, father & philosopher of black money is Chidambaram : Ram Jethmalani

Chidambaram cannot get black money out of his blood. Dr Subramanian Swamy has clearly stated in his website, "I now have further information from my usually reliable sources in the Union Government that the tapping of Finance Minister Mr. Pranab Mukherjee and his close associate in the Ministry, enabled Mr. Robert Vadra the son-in-law of Ms. Sonia Gandhi and Mr. Karthik son of Mr. P. Chidambaram, to use the data thereby collected to manipulate and rig the Mumbai stock market. Earlier these data were directly provided by the then Finance Minister Mr. Chidambaram. I demand that the SEBI be asked by PM to initiate 'Insider Trading' investigation and prosecution of Mr. Vadra and Mr. Karthik."


If what is put out by Dr Subramanian Swamy is false why doesn't Chidambaram sue him?


The dark clouds of the 2G scam and the repeated evidence being given by A. Raja and other accused of his tacit involvement and other acts of omission and commission are menacingly closing in on Chidambaram. He is losing his cool, and more importantly, losing his carefully clipped English accent to its more indigenous roots more often. And like his colleague Digvijay Singh, his mind seems to be disintegrating to a stage where he has started talking gibberish. Take this, for example: in reply to the BJP demand for his resignation for his involvement in the 2G scam, Chidambaram claims that the BJP is targeting him since he initiated a probe by the NIA into Hindu terror. Can any rational person see the connection between the two?


Take also his comments regarding the recent Mumbai blasts. As Home Minister, instead of taking stock of the situation, and providing leadership, the only intelligent thing he could think of saying was, "No intelligence is not intelligence failure." Even a college debating society expects better logic. It's something like saying "illness is not a failure of health" or "impotence is not a failure of potency".



Chidambaram's special financial skills have diversified into electoral politics also. He has the distinction of having been declared defeated in the last Lok Sabha election, after which he galvanized his special skills and local machinery, in particular, a data entry operator, and doctored a marginal victory on the recount. That is quite a record for fraud. And can one forget how the Indian Bank was cleaned up and left with only non-performing assets thanks to him and his Tamil Maanila buddies?


Chidambaram's record as Home Minister has been disastrous. Neither has he made any impact on internal security, with the worst massacres of his own paramilitary forces taking place in his time, nor on terrorism, which carries on in complete complacency because there are neither effective preventive or punitive systems in place, nor political will and national legislation to combat terrorism. It is on record and in the public domain that the Home Ministry gave incorrect names of India's most wanted list of terrorists allegedly hiding in Pakistan, some of whom were tracked living in India or in custody. Is this a testament to his fabled efficiency and commitment?


What a laughing stock we must be before the world. It is almost as if India is determined that it shall not combat terrorism, shall not have enabling legislation as enacted by the US, such as the Homeland Security Act 2002, and the Prevention of Terrorism Act 2005 of UK and similar legislations in European governments. India is determined not to have an effective national agency on the lines of the Homeland Security Department of the US. The ramshackle National Investigation Agency showed itself as a complete failure during the recent Mumbai attacks. Understandable, because its only mandate appears to be to investigate "Hindu terror", the last refuge for failed and hopeless Congressmen like Chidambaram. The CCTNS, JIC, ARC, NTRO (presently in another scam), and NCTC remain effete, scattered and unmonitorable, even by the Home Ministry. With such an unequivocal determination by the UPA government not to address terrorism effectively, I can only grieve for my country.

 

Rajiv’s killers

This article is taken from the times of india sunday paper dated 4-9-2011

In the assassin’s mind

On death row, Rajiv’s killers expected treatment fit for heroes

Jaya Menon | TNN

    Material Objects (MO) 124 and 125 are now just piles of paper gathering dust in a court vault. But they helped enlist an army of fighters, and assassins, for the Liberation Tigers of Tamil Eelam. ‘Satanic Force’, two large volumes of Tiger propaganda seized by CBI investigators soon after the assassination of Rajiv Gandhi gives an insight into the harsh indoctrination that LTTE cadres were put through.
    “There were more than 1,000 affidavits, mostly in Tamil, with names and addresses, narrations of cases of women raped and killed by the Indian Peace Keeping Force (IPKF), of men tortured and butchered. It would make anyone shed tears,” says K Ragothaman, the CBI’s chief investigating officer who interrogated the three Rajiv assassins, Murugan, Santhan and Perarivalan, for more than a month.
    So was this literature enough motivation for the dastardly act that changed India’s history forever? “It seems so. When I first met Murugan, he told me, ‘Sir, don’t beat and torture us like petty criminals. We are a part of a freedom movement. Of course, if we go back Prabahakaran (LTTE chief)will kill us. So please treat us with dignity.’ They did not think they were criminals or had committed a ghastly act. They believe, I am sure even today, that they killed Rajiv Gandhi for a cause and it was not a crime,” Ragothaman says.
    Murugan, the sharpest of the lot, enrolled into the movement while barely in his teens. He was given the charge, as ‘Indu Master’, of ‘questioning’ IPKF detainees. Santhan, another Lankan Tamil, was believed to be capable of ingratiating himself into anyone’s favour. He was a key operative in the killing of K Padmanabhan, leader of the EPRLF, another Sri Lankan Tamil group, in Chennai in June 1990. Perarivalan, an Indian Tamil, had a late indoctrination. At 18, he was taken to meet Prabhakaran and briefly inducted into the movement.
    The Supreme Court called Rajiv’s assassination “a diabolical crime”. The men and women who played a role in it had been ready to lay down their lives for the LTTE cause. But even the 'Satanic Force', it seems, cannot change human nature.
    After years on death row, the killers may just have mellowed somewhat. “Murugan's voice turns soft when he mentions his daughter Harithra,” says a lawyer who visited the trio on August 29, a day before the high court stayed their execution. “He would ask me if I had spoken to her, how her voice sounded — young or mature,” says the lawyer, asking not to be named.
    “All through, the three men were confident that they would be released. They believed they were innocent as there were bigger players behind the assassination,” says V Kannadasan, an advocate and longtime associate of the convicts. “When I last met Murugan on August 29, he said, ‘Are you letting go of us?’ But he said it jokingly. He is not scared of death.” Close associates, however, say that Santhan, who has turned almost ascetic, is a worried man. “He meditates five times a day, reads spiritual books and is constantly anxious about his fate,” says a well-wisher.
    Arputhammal Gnansekaran believes her son Perarivalan is innocent. “We supported the Eelam cause and loved and respected Prabhakaran. But Arivu (Perarivalan) never knew there was a plot to kill Rajiv Gandhi. He is such a soft boy that he would put his head down during violent scenes in films. How can such a person put together explosives to kill a person?” When she met her son last week, he assured her he would be out soon and that justice would prevail.